A whole dreamy day

Last week I had lunch with my grandparents in the city. As they walked me back to my office, my grandfather pointed to a nondescript building with a corporate logo and tinted glass.

In the 1950s, it was the hotel of choice for Greeks in town for a wedding.

Granddad recalled meeting my grandmother out the front when they were still just kids, and spending a whole dreamy day showing her around the city.

She was wearing a red and white dress she'd made herself, he says, and she smiles. He knew she loved oysters, so at lunchtime he took her to the oyster bar downstairs at David Jones.

It cost him four shillings - they could have gone to the pictures four times instead - but of course, it was worth it.

Now when I see that building I don't see a bland corporate office. I see my grandmother as a young girl, standing out the front in a red and white dress, about to experience one of the happiest days of her life.

Treasures

A lady I know had her handbag returned to her after it had been stolen... thirty five years previously! It was like one of those little time capsules, full of ID with a photo of her younger self, a letter that she had been sent, make-up, etc.

This reminded me of what I used to do as a child. I would get around to cleaning my room every one or two years, and I loved finding old handbags full of things that I'd forgotten about. So I started to plant things for myself to find a few years in the future. Some money (a nice surprise!), a lipstick, a little note, etc.

If I lost my handbag today and had it returned to me in 20 years, I would find five types of foreign money, tic tacs, a camera with a memory card full of photos, a beanie, panadol, an Oyster card, and bandaids.

A treasure trove!

One choice too many

I guess it was only a matter of time - euthanasia is back on the parliamentary agenda.

The more I think about this issue, the more strongly I feel about it.

Even if we could somehow ensure the option of inducing death would never cause anyone to feel pressured or guilt-tripped into making that choice - which we couldn't - I'd still be against it.

Even we could be sure it wouldn't lead to a survival-of-the-fittest mentality that deems people who are past a certain point a liability, and even if we could be sure it wouldn't compromise funding for quality palliative care - I'd still be against it.

Caring for someone who is dying is difficult enough when the focus is on making them as comfortable as possible.

I worry that inviting people to choose whether or not they should end their life sooner - and expecting doctors to offer advice if not help - would only make this process more complicated, upsetting and guilt-ridden for everyone involved.

It's not that I don't feel for people who desperately want their pain or the pain of a loved one to end, and it's not that some individual case studies don't make me question my stance. It's just that I don't see this as the answer.

Most importantly of all, I'd argue that the assumption we all have "the right to die" is based on a presupposition that warrants intense scrutiny.

The girl who collected words

Last night I met a Japanese girl who knew how to say “I love you” in multiple languages.

“I used to collect 'I love yous',” she explained.

Then, if somebody said it to her in another language, she'd be able to understand and reciprocate.

She's since given up. Having had no opportunity to make use of her collection, she deemed it useless.

A battle not worth fighting

An event taking place next August made the news today. Why? Because of its dress code.

The dress code - which requires people to cover their thighs, shoulders and everything in-between - has received quite a lot of publicity.

This is surprising considering the event: a two hour, after hours swimming lesson.

Perhaps the "outcry" is less surprising when you consider the reasons behind it are religious - the ban was designed to accommodate Muslim women during Ramadan.

I know religion is a great way to stir up controversy, but in this case, I'm not sure it's warranted.

A woman interviewed on SBS news expressed the view that people like her shouldn't have to cover up for people like them. As far as I can tell, no one's asking her to. And even if she is planning to attend this particular swimming lesson, would it be so terrible to wear board shorts and a t-shirt just this once?

I think religion has a lot to answer for, but there's something to be said for choosing your battles.

Counting down the days

A couple of years ago, my husband made a website to count down the days till a certain job was over.

He hadn't given it a second thought until a few days ago, when he glanced at the analytics.

Apparently there's a market out there for counting down to (or up from) events, because thousands of random strangers have created a total of 16,000 countdowns (and ups).

There are countdowns to babies, weddings and holidays, there's a countdown to deer season (71 days, 0 hours, 59 minutes, 58 seconds), one to retirement (806 days, 1 hour, 0 minutes, 48 seconds) and one to going home (0 days, hours, 0 minutes, 0 seconds).

It's never been advertised but more than 500 people visit the site each day. I'm both fascinated and disturbed.

countdowndays.com

Double standards

I'm ashamed to admit it, but I used to think there was no need to say sorry to the Aboriginal people. We invaded their land and stole their children, but the worst of it was over before I was even born. What did I have to apologise for?

I also used to find it incredibly unfair when my primary school teacher gave my class a detention without excusing those of us who were (very indignantly) innocent.

Part of me still struggles with the notion of taking responsibility for something I wasn't directly involved in - though I'm happy to take credit for my upbringing and education, which fell neatly into my lap.

I wonder the extent to which my attitudes are a product of my culture's obsession with the rights/needs/desires of the individual, and our dwindling sense of community. It leaves little room for the notion of corporate guilt.

Even harder to accept is the Bible's teaching that the first ever human's rebellion against God tainted the entire human race.

Tim Keller, a New York preacher, engages with these issues in his talk "Real Friendship and the Pleading Priest". The talk is about Abraham's first intercessory prayer, which implies a corporate responsibility where sin - but also righteousness - can be ascribed to people.

Before explaining how and why Moses' actions point to the ultimate intercessor, Keller thinks through some of the cultural issues that could be barriers for his New Yorker audience.

The lucky country

I interviewed a guy about suicide today. Apparently it's become the single most likely cause of death for Australian men under the age of 44 and women under 34. On average, seven Australians kill themselves every day.

And countless more have attempted, or at least contemplated, doing the same.

Australia is a rich, vast, beautiful place to live. We complain about the state of education, healthcare, public transport and housing, but that's only because there's not much else to complain about. Compared to other countries, we appear to be doing OK.

And yet, we're killing ourselves. And not really talking about it.

Clinical depression is obviously part of it, and the silence isn't helping, but the numbers are so high... I can't help but think there's more to it than that.